I’ll make this short and sweet, like my experience at the DMV. But my soul can’t rest until I share with my fellow moms my recommendation for the DMV as your next destination when you need a break.

Consider this. When one of your oldest kids is sick, another is a threenager, and twins popped out of nowhere and embraced the terrible twos overnight, it’s time to admit you need a break. But babysitters can be expensive. I suggest a cheaper option: renewing your car’s registration.

The most important part of this plan is that you do not take your kids with you to the DMV. They have recently instituted a strict no-complaining rule, which kids do not readily comply with. Since they can’t come, it’s time to start guilt tripping everyone you know. Lay it on thick to maximize sympathy.

“I just don’t know how I’m going to do it. Some people say they wait at the DMV for over an hour. Can you imagine doing that with toddlers? I guess I’ll try to get them to watch the iPad the whole time.”

When you’ve suckered your screen-time-hating friend into watching your kids, let the games begin. Entering the DMV without children will be like walking into a spa. Greeted by a host of smiling people, you’ll wonder why you’ve never tried this before. You’ll have an unprecedented amount of time to engage in your favorite hobbies, including reading, knitting, journaling, or surfing social media, especially if you can engage in any of these hobbies standing up. Just don’t be foolish enough to bring anything you need to sit down to do. The DMV is adamantly opposed to excessive seating arrangements, as is any health-conscious establishment.

Are you one of those health conscious moms who wishes she could exercise more and find a weight loss regiment that works for her? Frequent DMV visits are the thing for you. Food and drink of any kind is not allowed inside the building, so you don’t have to worry about overeating. If you’re one of the lucky few (thousand) who get to spend all day there, you’ll certainly lose a few pounds to starvation. As far as exercise goes, you’ll be pleased to know that they conduct frequent evacuations of all standing patrons, due to fire hazard. You’ll get your money’s worth in Fitbit steps, no doubt!

Around the three or four hour mark, standing in an unlabeled and therefore equal opportunity line, mom guilt may try to creep into your mind. You feel bad for your kids. You wonder if you provided lunch or nap time instructions for your babysitter. You feel bad for your babysitter. Has your oldest thrown up on them yet? Try not to listen to your inner mom. This is your spa day. Enjoy it. Don’t worry about your children, the babysitter, or the car registration you accidentally left in your diaper bag at home. Remember one thing, and you’ll have no problem embracing the serenity of your day off: The DMV is the place where everything works out.

Happy relaxing, mommy!